My musings around feeling the pressure, being triggered, old wounds and how I am navigating it all.
“We have a tendency to think in terms of doing and not in terms of being. We think that when we are not doing anything, we are wasting our time. But that is not true. Our time is first of all for us to be. To be what? To be alive, to be peaceful, to be joyful, to be loving. And that is what the world needs most.”
Thich Nhat Hanh
On the 8th September Queen Elizabeth ll died. 9th September; Mercury Retrograde kicked off with the Full moon in Pisces coming to its fullness on Saturday, 10th September.
The Queens death, whilst expected, brought up the pain of grief. So many layers but the most prominent for me is the reminder of loved ones who have died and knowing the pain that the children & friends of the Queen are going through as I am too reminded of my parents death as well as my friends who have recently died.
Grief is the price we pay for Love. Queen Elizabeth ll
The Full moon in Pisces
Pisces is the last sign of the zodiac and is therefore said to hold the lessons of all the other signs inside of it. A Pisces feels psychically connected to everyone and everything, and so a full moon in Pisces can be a super-sensitive, emotional time — and a time to listen to your intuition. Read more about the Full moon in Pisces here
Mercury in Retrograde
A time of healing, of retrospection, of going within. As you find yourself revisiting the past, especially back to times that you forgot your value, forgot your worth and forgot yourself. Looking at areas that are unhealed, any loose ends and unfinished business. These next few weeks are going to be a powerful time to deepen the most important relationship you will ever have, the one with yourself. To realise your value, worth, what you want and need and who you want to be in relationships. Watch the Mercury Retrograde Workshop reply by Kirsty Gallagher
The energies have been off the wall intense. For me, I know that all these things above have accumulated in this pressure. It felt like my temples were in a vice, my heart has been sore and I have been triggered left right and centre with my abdomnment shadow coming out to play. I was feeling scattered with a pressure of 'I must get things done' but not knowing where to start or even with an inclination to start as I felt absolutely dog tired.
How did I navigate all of this?
First and foremost, I understood that everything that was happening to me and triigering feelings and emotions within my emotional body - was all happening for me and not to me. I knew that I needed to give it the space to ride through me and also for me to sit with the uncomfortability of it all. All of this will pass and until then I get to expand and work my way through another layer.
Cleansing
My friend, Sarah and I went for a swim with her children in her beautiful lake on Sunday afternoon. It was exactly what we all needed. The cleansing of the freshwater spring in supporting us in this watery full moon. This full moon that had been guiding us towards our shadows, our blind spots and our areas of expansion.
Feeling the soft caress of the water as she held me, alowing me to move with presence. I could still feel the presence of the moon (even though it was daylight). I thanked her as I dipping my head under water as if I was baptising myself in Gods natural sacred space.
Grounding
On Monday my body was craving plenty of water and grounding foods. Making myself a Banana, blueberry, macca and cacao smoothie. Was just the ticket. Straight away I could feel the pressure in my head dissipate. That evening I had ballet - moving my body, moved the energy around as well as activating my soul chakras. Releasing energy out of my body. Release. Release. Release.
On Tuesday I met with my friend Katie and we went off into Snelsmore Common for a walk in the rain. The rain was just perfect as it dappened the soil, releasing the petrichor into the air. We both listened to the other as we shared our wounds, our shadows with no intention of fixing the other. Being present for one another, holding space as we listened.
In all of this I am noticing that I am being asked to take better care of my boundaries & to create a deeper connection.
As part of creating a deeper connection I have deleted Social Media. I am now exploring how it would work if I share more via my Blog. For me it has never been around the amount of people who like or read my posts. But here I feel I can get a deeper connection than the ones on IG. I am also looking at exploring the world of YouTube....watch this space.
Boundaries will always be a work in progress. In most areas of my life, my boundaries are rock solid and then I let them slide until I find myself in a world of doing for other people in a way where I am no good for them or myself. I am a 5th line in Human Design and this guy trips me up without me even realising.
My focus for the rest of this mercury retrograde is to continue a deep grounding practice.
Grounding meditation
Working with crystals that support my Root Chakra - Goji Balls, stromatalite
Using grounding essential oils - Vetiver & cedarwood (my two favourites)
Drinking Cacao and Macca
Eating Grounding foods - red meat, potatoes
Drinking plenty of water
Deep grounding breathwork exercises
Epsom salt baths = to continue to cleanse my energy so it is clean & strong
Akashic healing and clearing
As we continue to navigate the rollercoaster of energy, noticing the shadows that are wanting to be released and asking for love. Observe, ground and cleanse as you ride the energies. being gentle on yourself as you move through them all. Making changes, even though some are going to be incredibly uncomfortable.
There is no authenticity without boundaries. This is tough for those of us who were raised to believe that being liked and keeping people comfortable are more important than our own self-worth. My mantra in those moments: Choose discomfort over resentment. Brene Brown
How did you find this period of time and what have you found to be help you in navigating this time?
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